34 weeks

I'm 34 weeks today...which means we've got six weeks to go! (Do you like my delusion that I'll give birth to this baby on her due date, despite the fact that only 5% of babies are born on their actual due date? Yeah, me too.)

I've gotten a couple of comments on how big I look, so I trolled back through the photo archives to do a side-by-side comparison with my previous pregnancies. Of course, there is nothing from A's pregnancy, but I did find one with E.

Honestly, I feel like I'm slightly smaller than I was with E. And carrying a little lower. Which makes me feel marginally better. And I think we can all agree that my hair should never be cut in the 2004 style again.

We've made progress on getting ready for baby. Her room is coming together. I purchased an Ergo Baby Carrier from BabySteals yesterday for a bargain. And, this weekend, I'm headed to Babys-R-Us this weekend to trade in our old infant seat (which expired) and getting a new one.

It kind of cracks me up, because even though my kids aren't *that* old, but it seems like so much has changed! The car seat expired! The bottles are poison (BPA)! The crib is a death trap! I swear, it makes my head spin how different things are in just a few years!

my achilles heel tooth

Motherhood is a pretty disgusting job. First of all, there are all of the changes your body goes through. And, then there's labor and recovery from that. But, all that's just the warm up for actually having children.

I've been peed on, pooped on, puked on, bled on, sneezed on, coughed on, and drooled on.

I've more wiped heinies and noses than I care to count.

I have stuck out my hand to catch the half-chewed pieces of food my children have determined they no longer care to eat. I've done this with puke, too.

I've become a pro at taking temperatures rectally.

I've done all of these things, in the name of motherhood. And, for the most part, it hasn't bothered me. But, we have entered a phase of motherhood that I do not have the stomach for. The mere thought of sends chills down my spine.

E's tooth is about to fall out.

After months of being on Loose Tooth watch, E's tooth is really loose. Like hanging by a thread loose. Perpendicular to her other teeth loose. And I get nauseous just looking at it.

To make matters worse, she keeps asking ME to pull it out. Which on the one hand, I would just to make it go away. On the other, GAH! It's so gross.

So, wise people of The Internet...how the hell do I get this tooth out of her mouth? I'd much rather see the gaping hole where a tooth was than what's there right now. Besides, I totally made JerseyBaby send me her tooth-fairy certificate to use with E...so I'm jazzed to use it!

dear fancy nancy

I cannot thank you enough for all that you do. Your books are some of our favorites. I can read them over and over over (and over) again without wanting to gouge my eyes out.

They were also some of the first books that E was able to read independently.

You've introduced very fancy vocabulary into our everyday conversations, such as dining al fresco.

But, most of all, for the second year in a row, you've come through in a pinch when A's needed a costume for her school's Halloween Parade. A trip down to the bin of dress-up clothes is all it takes, which especially nice when A's actual costume is waiting for her in California.

 

So, thank you, Fancy Nancy! Or, should I say Merci Beaucoup instead?

it's that time of the year again

It's football time, yet again.

 

And, in case you were wondering what life is like around these parts during the fall, here are the FAQs about Football Chez Slacker.

I'm not going to lie, the enthusiasm is a bit tempered around these parts this year because...well...UVA and UT are both supposed to suck. Luckily, the Cincinatti Reds are 1st in their division (and 7 1/2 games ahead of the Cards)...making it likely that they'll make the playoffs this year!

Can you just *feel* the enthusiasm that I have for watching inning after endless inning of baseball this fall? Maybe I need to write the GM for the Reds a letter.

au naturel

Over the last few months, my hair was getting harder and harder to style. I was beginning to consider the effort needed to blow-dry it straight commensurate with a workout. It started requiring the use of a flat iron every day (unless I was going for the frizzy/poufy look). So finally, I said "to hell with it", and embraced the curl in my hair. I got a haircut that helped the curls and started using the correct products.

Overall, I've been happy with how it looked. But I wondered if I was rockin' an out-of-date style. There aren't too many wavy/curly girls to look up to, you know.

Well, lo and behold, my hair idol, Katie Holmes, must have sensed my doubts. 'Cause guess who's rocking a curly-with-bangs style right now?

Hell yeah. Though, let the record show that for once, she totally copied me!

iLove it

For an Anniversary/Mother's Day gift, I got an iPhone. I had long wanted one, but was unsure if I would use it. My old phone was your basic free phone (albeit in a cheery pink color), and I coudn't seem to remember to charge it. Nonetheless, I finally took the plunge and it's been true love ever since.

I like not having to log into my computer to check my e-mail. I got the armband so I can use it when I run (although it is kind of bulky) and ordered the Nike+ sensor so I can track my running mileage (you know, since I'm a big time runner after finishing my race). But thus far, my favorite app has been Hipstamatic.

I'd seen a bunch of other bloggers mention how cool it is, so it was the first app I bought. I haven't had much time to play with it...but so far, I think it's awesome. In fact, one of the pictures I took the other day is my current favorite picture ever.

I think the lighting on this looks pretty cool. And I love that, at first glance at least, it looks like the girls are running through a forest or something. When, in reality, they are running from giant, gaping hole in our side yard to the front of the house to go play on the building supplies. Maybe it's the sleep deprivation talking...I don't know.

So, what about you, fellow iPhone users? What's your favorite app? What do I need to get up on my phone, and pronto?

coming attractions

For some reason, I cannot sit down long enough to actually write any of these blog posts...but rest assured, the following posts should be forthcoming:

• A round-up of the Slacker Family Christmas (Also titled: If You Give Your Kids Bikes for Christmas, Make Sure You Don't Do it When There's a Sub-Arctic Cold Spell or You Will Either Freeze Your Ass Off OR Have to EndureConstant Whining about Wanting to Go Outside and Ride Them)
  
• The Slacker 2009 Year in Review (Also titled: Damn, These Kids are Cute Year-round!)
  
• Slacker Mama's 2010 Resolutions (Also titled: The BeerTender My Mom gave John for Christmas Will Likely Kill Any 2010 Weight-loss Goals)
  
• I Was a Picky Eater as a Child...Karma's a Bitch (Also titled: Seriously, What Kind of Freaky Kids *Won't* Eat Sloppy Joes?!?!?)

So you have those to look forward to. Let's hope "No cussing" is not a Slacker Mama resolution, because I think this post pretty much killed that dream.

fuzzy milestones

One of my reluctance to document E and A's milestones in some sort of baby book (you know, other than complete laziness) was because I'm a stickler for details. And babies aren't an exact science. So...sure...you might notice that they got a tooth on January 3rd...but who's to say that they had it for a whole month unbeknownst to you and your prying fingers!

I honestly couldn't tell you what either girl's first word was. Especially since we did sign language with both kids...did the first sign they made count as their first word or did it have to be the spoken word? And, either way, how do you know it was their first and when it occurred? What if they were saying a whole bunch of other words and we just didn't know it?

And so it is with E reading. She's been "reading" pages of books for a while. But those were her favorites, like Fancy Nancy, that we read all the time. And she could recite them whether or not she had the book in front of her. Then she started to pick up on other words in other books. But in the past week or so, she's been reading those starter books to me, with very little prompting of words or correction. Some of it might be basic memorization...but the other night she picked a book off the shelf that I can't remember reading in months and read it to me. So, I think it's safe to say that E has learned to read.

I'll mark it on my calendar.

In other where-the-hell-did-my-baby-go news...we headed to the dentist on Monday. (And, yes, A was insanely jealous. Dentist = Doctor in their little minds.) But the dentist pointed out that E's bottom two teeth are the ever so slightest bit loose. So, ToothWatch '09 has commenced at Chez Slacker!

roadtrip memories

The Slackers are OFF on our trip to the beach! I've got a few posts scheduled for this week (I was procrastinating finishing up work and packing)...so that should be fun.

As we've been getting prepared to go, I've been reminiscing about the travels of our youth. And, just like any good parent should, I've been trying to tell E and A just how different life was way back when.

We didn't have the pesky confines of booster seats or car seats to hold us down! Nope. My parents would put an air mattress in the back of our Jimmy (aka, old school SUV) and Kiki and I would sleep until our first stop. We would then spend the rest of the time arguing over taking turns sitting on The Hump (aka, the armrest in the front seat). That is, unless I was feeling puke-y...and then I was sitting outright in the front seat while my mom snuggled with Kara in the back.

For music, there was no Laurie Berkner or "kids" music to keep us entertained. Our family listened to Simon and Garfunkel's Concert in Central Park, which my dad had taped from the multi-record set.

And when we got sick of music, we didn't get to watch DVDs. Instead, we listened to books on tape. We listened to The Little Women every summer at least twice. We also listened to The Little Mermaid. Not the Disney version...but the Hans Christian Andersen version upon which Disney based their version. I thought about forcing my parents to find it so the girls could listen to it, but decided against it because there is no singing, and in the original the Little Mermaid ***SPOILER ALERT*** turns to sea foam. One day I'll let them listen to it, and maybe then they'll carry on the tradition that Kiki and I started of picking up foam at the beach and screaming "Hey LOOK! It's the Little Mermaid!"

Or maybe, they'll be spared the nerdiness that clearly their mother and aunt got.

sure they are cool, but do they have autographs on their asses?

When I was about 8 or so, the Cabbage Patch Kid was firing up. Also, back in those days, there was no internet...so stores had to send out catalogs of all the products they offered. So when the latest BEST catalog came out, my sister and I were delighted to find they had a 2 page spread on the CPKs.

I remember that Kiki and I would spend hours looking at those two pages. We would ponder which Kid we wanted the most -- the girl with the braids or the boy with the dimples. Did we like the pink dress or the t-shirt and jeans outfit better?

Sometime earlier this week, the American Girl catalog arrived Chez Slacker. Similar to when the Oriental Trading catalog arrived last summer, E has been studying its glossy pages ever since she got her grubby little paws on it.

Last night, in lieu of a story, we looked through the catalog. We picked out the dolls she liked best, and we named all of the different characters. This morning, John and I were able to eek out a couple more minutes of sleep when she brought in the catalog and looked through it one more time.

Right now, E's torn between wanting a doll named Elizabeth or one that looks eerily like her:

Not to scale

Luckily, she has a few months before her birthday to make up her mind.

And I have a few months to come to terms with spending that much money on a freaking doll.

for the love of pete...

Don't let the lack of raindrops on the current forecast fool you. It is currently pouring rain right now. For the god-knows-how-many-th day in a row. And it will continue to do so until Sunday. SUNDAY!

And to think I hesitated buying A a new raincoat last month because I wasn't sure if she'd get any use out of it.

a stroke of genius = a new tradition

After someone knocked over a basket full of empty plastic eggs for the millionth time since Sunday, I made an announcement to the girls tonight.

"We have to put all the eggs in the baskets and leave them by the fireplace."
"But, why, mama?" E asked.
"Because the Easter bunny is coming tonight to get them. He needs to bring them back to his...uh...bunny house so he can fill them up next year. So we'll leave them by the fireplace and he'll get them tonight."
"Does he come down the chimney to get them?" E asked.
"No. That's Santa." I replied. "The Easter Bunny...uh...uses the back door."

There was some mild protest that was quickly alleviated by letting them pick two eggs each to play with until next year. E chose wisely -- a pink egg with a purse on it and a Tinkerbell egg. A picked a dark green one and a blue one. Then the bid farewell to the basket and went to bed.

And I bid farewell to the fear that one of us would break our neck on a plastic egg.

i'm sure they made a note in her file

I took the plunge today and registered E for Kindergarten. The final piece of paperwork (from the Pediatrician) became ready, so I had no reason not to. Also, my neurotic side was convinced that if I waited until the last day, something would surely happen that would prevent me from making it to registration on the later date...and E wouldn't be able to go to K next year.

I had my forms filled out in my neatest penmanship. This morning when I got dressed, I actually put on make-up and an outfit (as opposed to the sweat pants that I normally where on my work-from-home days). I wanted to make sure those elementary school people thought that I was a responsible mom and have them beg me to join the PTA (or PTO or whatever the acronym is these days) on the spot. I applied some lip gloss, made sure my hair wasn't sticking out funny, and strode confidently into the school, where I was greeted by a teacher who asked for my ID.

It was then I realized I had left my wallet at home on the kitchen counter.

I had actually taken it out to make sure that I had my license and voter registration card (2 documents to prove residency) and then neglected to put it back in my purse. Luckily, because I am so neurotic prepared, I had brought enough other documentation where they actually didn't need to see my license, and E was successfully registered as a Kindergartner (Class of 2022, baby!)

I just don't expect a call from the PTO anytime soon.

denial: it ain't just a river in egypt

My county has two days devoted to Kindergarten registration. Guess who's going to hold off until that second day...in part because she couldn't get the paperwork together in time (seriously people, getting a mortgage involves less paper trail than this!) and in part because I just can't bring myself to admit that my first born (my sweet pea! my goose! my sweet baby girl!) is actually old enough to go to kindergarten?

I mean, wasn't it just yesterday that she looked like this?

Excuse me while I go sob uncontrollably into my coffee.

before and after

So the playdate on Monday was tons of fun. It was great to get back in touch with some of the ladies that I had lost touch with. And it was crazy to see all of the babies as big kids. I think it's a lot like losing weight...you don't really notice that someone's dropped 10 pounds if you see them every day because the change is gradual; but you'll immediately see it on someone you see every now and again. Some of these kids I hadn't seen since they were *crawling*...so to see the difference now? It was mind boggling.

There were 17 kids there total as everyone had a second (and a third, in Marathon Mom's case). We didn't take a picture until the very end, so we didn't capture all of the madness. In the picture the 5 boys and E are the original babies (Julia and A were the only sibs that wanted to get their picture taken.

The Kiddos on Monday

Halloween 2004 with Cooper and Brian (the two boys standing above)

Halloween 2004 with William (in the red pants above)

March 2005 with Cooper (In the UVA shirt above...can you tell his parents are 'Hoos, too?)

June 2005 with William

I will say this...I am *not* a fan of babies. Sure, they are cute and all but the crying, not doing anything and lack-of-sleep-thing just doesn't do it for me. But give me a toddler and I'm in hog heaven. After holding the always-happy Baby Meredith, playing with the 13-month-old son of my friend and looking back at the pictures from E's first year...I *so* have toddler fever right now.

Too bad kids don't come out of the womb at 11 months old.

blech

I'm not going to lie to you, I'm in a crappy mood today. Getting E to get dressed today was a major battle. A spilled chocolate milk all over the floor (yes, I know, chocolate milk at 8AM ... don't you judge me!). Work is just no fun right now and there's way too much to do. And, to top it off, the woman who waxed my eyebrows last night apparently felt like having a left eyebrow was "optional."

I do have some pictures from Monday to post. We met Marathon Mom and her brood at El Tio for some mexican food and face-painting. 'Cause nothing says "Ole!" like a sparkly-farkly unicorn on your forearm. And, I'm also going to annoy you again with a Disney post...since we are going in a week(!) and I oscillate between excitement and panic of all the crap I have to do to get ready.

But until then...make me feel better and help me procrastinate by leaving me comments. Really, it's the least you can do.

gobble gobble

It's Thanksgiving morning and John and I are enjoying a cup of coffee (that may or may not be decaf) while the girls play with 30 year old matchbox cars and a creepy baby borrowed from Grandmom's best friend like it's their job. There might be some parade watching or there might be a turkey trot in our future. Whatever we feel like, we'll do...which is SO, SO nice.

Getting to today has been a rough ride this past week. I was super busy with work (think: 60 hours last week), A has been back to her nocturnal shenanigans and threw up within our of our departure from Chez Slacker yesterday. But we made the trip without any puking...and only two potty breaks. And now it's time to sit back and relax and think of all I'm grateful for.

• I'm grateful for my husband...who in addition to being an all-around great guy...really helped out this last week while I was trapped in work hell. He did outings! He cooked dinner! He made crafts! All without grumbling. He is truly and equal partner and I'm so happy he's mine.
  
• I'm thankful for my two beautiful daughters, who are generous with the kisses, hugs and I love yous. In the past year they have become best of friends, playing side-by-side for hoursminutes on end...which is both heart-warming and allows me to get dinner on the table without stepping on a child.
  
• I'm thankful for grandparents. Nonna, Pop-pop, Grandmom and Granddad are all an presence in our girls lives. As someone who lost all of my grandparents at such an early age, this thrills me to no end. And the fact that they provide free babysitting is always a bonus.
  
• I'm thankful for family. We don't get to see Kiki and Uncle Steve or John's brother and sister-in-law as much as we would like...but it's always good times when we do. And, now that the girls remember them between, it's even better.
  
• I'm thankful for friends. Since lives have inevitably gotten more complicated with jobs and kids and everything else, it's so great to see my friends when I can. And I'm grateful that I've made some new online friends through this blog, too!

Hope your turkey days are happy!

i voted ... did you?

After I dropped the girls off at school today, I went and voted. I was bummed that I couldn't bring the girls with me...I threw E in the stroller and walked to the polls in 2004 and braved the cold and rain with A in a sling and E in the stroller for the gubernatorial elections in 2006. However, when they see my sticker tonight, they will ask what it is for and I will tell them.

A and E will be eligible to vote in the 2024 elections. I hope that our country has stabilized from all of the turmoil and solved the problems that are plaguing us right now. I do believe that we will emerge as a stronger and better nation after this election. It's a daunting task that lies ahead, but can we do it?

Yes. We can.

sweet as candy

As a mom, you have so many hopes and dreams for your kids. You want them to be smart and funny and athletic and to never have a bad hair day or a zit on the day of school pictures. But, above all the things I want for my children...I truly just want them to be kind.

This weekend at the Birthday Extravaganza Party, I had the opportunity to meet two of E's classmates' mothers. Yes, there was the usual chit-chat of the funny things that the girls do -- like fight wearing the uniform every Monday through Thursday. But, both women totally unprompted said something to the effect of "E is just so kind and helpful with all the other kids in the class." It made me so proud to know that others saw in E what I did...and that it's not just a mother's bias that saw it.

Then, the magician/face painter/Belle impersonator handed out little treat bags to all of the kids. E came running over to me with a wide smile.

"Mama, look!" she said. "Belle gave me *two* lollipops! One for me and one for A!"

And yesterday, when I picked E up from school, she was toting a goody bag from Kaeli's school party. (Yes, I'm serious. Goody bags at school. I'll have to check her wine consumption but it's becoming a little apparent that Kaeli's mom and I could not be friends.) Anyway, on the drive home, I told E that she couldn't open the goody bag until after dinner, and then she could pick whatever she wanted for dessert. As E studied the contents through the clear cellophane she shouted,

"Mama! There's some candy that I want to eat and a Ring Pop! A can have the Ring Pop for dessert while I have the candy!"

Oh, how happy I was that my little girl would hand over the contents of a gift given only to her to her sister. I had a little smile on for the rest of the night.

Sure, she might have tried to take the Ring Pop from A once the candy was finished and A was still happily sucking on it...she's nice but not a saint. But even then she took a few licks and gave it back. She's nice enough to even share her germs with her sister!

counting my blessings

I was in the midst of writing a post about how last evening was a comedy of errors in the Slacker house...one that involved cat puke, whiny kids and John eating all of the rice.

But then, I read my e-mail.

A mom in a neighboring mom's group had a heart attack early last Thursday, which has left her comatose with a grim prognosis. She has two girls, 2 1/2 and 6 months. The family has started blog which details what they are going through, and I found myself crying as I read it in in my cubicle. Her mom's club is spearheading gift card drive that the Nolan family can use to buy essential items. If you want to find out more information on how to donate, please go here.

So if you are the praying type, please put the Nolan family in your prayers. But whatever you do, take a moment to hug your loved ones. I know I certainly am going to.